Saying goodbye to baby centre

At the start of my first pregnancy I joined up with Baby Centre, read books and probably underlined and made notes. I was getting prepared after all. It's funny to look back on now.....I honestly had no idea what I was getting into. I still parented pretty much like a headless chicken the first couple of months but lucky me and the wee man finally relaxed about it all and the wee man and I fell into a happy routine. Baby centre has followed us all the way through and so it felt like a milestone when on his 5th birthday I got my last email! It was one of those emails that I used to religiously read, then on the odd occasion then it would mostly get deleted. The email itself started to get less complicated and detailed too. He is no longer my baby, no more a toddler and has said goodbye to preschool status. When I had the diva I quickly forgot what it was like to just parent one and it wasn't until recently that I realised what parenting just a five year old was like. The Diva was settling into nursery and the wee man and I could spend the half term together. It was well easy, not perfect, but the wee man has definately grown up. So many things you no longer have to worry about.... Naps, snacks, having lunch at specific times. He is no longer as quickly distracted and we sat together having the nicest chat and lunch at the café.

Parenting the wee man has changed. The why questions have become a lot more difficult now. He is so busy absorbing and learning new things that he impresses me everyday. The kiss shop has supposedly closed but we get lots of big hugs. So I am happily saying goodbye to baby centre but he will always be my baby anyway.

Comparatively not a perfect mum

Does every mother worry if she is getting right? Does every mother compare herself to other mums, their children to other children? These days as my son seems to be growing so fast I am not sure at what point I really started to relax into being a mum. Accepting this new label and running with the flow.

You know it was kind of hard for me to write my previous post about not being able to breastfeed my wee man. You see it's because I suddenly found myself stressing about most things in those early days not just breastfeeding. I was no relaxed carefree mum just going with the flow. I was actually not even sure how much I was bonding with my wee man. When it was time for hubby to go back to work I kind of freaked to be left on my own. He was so tiny, so dependant on me. Because of all my constant worries I feel like I missed out a lot on little things. On perfect cuddles, on perfect kisses, on counting perfect little fingers and perfect little toes.

Everyone, every mother, has their own opinion about parenting. Some will even judge you quite harshly for the decisions you choose to make. If your little family is happy and your little family is not being hurt or neglected how can anyone judge you harshly for what you have chosen to do. For choosing to breastfeed until your child is older than 6 months. For choosing to bottle feed instead of breast feed. For choosing to co sleep with your baby. For choosing to use a dummy as a comforter. For choosing to establish routines. For choosing to be a working mum. For choosing to be a stay at home mother.

I have come to realise that comparatively I am not a perfect mum. Maybe there are mums out there who do it better than me, who has a child that is better than mine. Who is that happy carefree mum just going with the flow and never worrying. I look at my wee man now though and don't mind. I make my choices for him and try every moment not to miss out on the little things.