A mum and a wife and sometimes just me

Monday 31 October 2011

Happy Halloween!

My son was actually very lucky he had a costume to wear. We were sent a note from nursery that they were having a party and it would be nice if he could dress up. You mean I need to go out and buy a costume that my son is only going to wear once AND he does not understand what is happening...Damn Right! Many thanks to Zia Silvia who had given us this body suit when my son was just 'The Bean' because she is just cool like that and figures her nipote needs to be too. Who am I to argue with such logic. Anyway you don't need to read my useless ramblings, here is a picture of my wee man....

Are you scared????

Sunday 30 October 2011

Baby flu

So I am starting to forget when my son was actually not suffering from the flu, bug, virus or whatever you want to label it. 

I am not a worrisome sort of mum , okay scratch that in the first 3 months of his life that is probably all I did about certain things (but that's a different story), so when he got his first cold I figured we would just ride the storm. We were only taking a plane two days later but my son the trooper did not let it bother him. The boy flies better than me thank goodness. Anyway a week later and it was gone. It must have been the sunshine in Italy!!! 

You see it must be at least 4 weeks ago now the tell tale dry cough started. I remember saying to hubby I bet you this is a cold. Okay it did not help that I was just getting over one and well seeing the amount of time we spend with each it was kind of inevitable that I would share my germs...ooops. It started it's life as a simple cold, the usually sneezes and stuffy nose. I thought like previously a week later and it would go away. Who am I kidding? This is Scotland now. One day he woke up from an afternoon nap and the coughing and spluttering got mum on high alert. Seriously it so didn't sound right to me that I actually called the doctor there and then. Never mind that by the time I spoke to the doctor said cough disappeared and my son was singing in the background. Yeah I know what he was thinking, another worrisome mother wasting my valuable time but bless him he was really nice about it all.  The cough though actually never went away and my poor wee man sounded horrible. Hi ho hi ho it's off to the doctor we really go...Why??? They said what I knew they would say, he'll get over it. Then said cough was suddenly accompanied by gagging and puke...lots and lots of puke cause once my son started well like a can a Pringles once you pop....After day two of the hurling we thought maybe we were justified to see the doctor then....Why??? They said what I knew they would say, he'll get over it.

4 weeks later and he has not got over it. My sister is a paediatrician and I won't tell you the advice she gave us but thankfully it seems to be working. I understand the reluctance of doctors to hand out medicine for wee babies, I'm a social worker and a mum after all. I still have not gotten over the fact that the Anderson's teething powder is in limited supply because it is actually used by drug users. Anyway, at least the coughing and puke have pretty much stopped anyway. Now it's just a lot of green gunk making it's way out of his system. I've been tempted to take a picture for this post but thought I would spare you.  You know as well that my son goes to nursery right...this is probably not the last we will see of the dreaded Baby Flu.

Monday 24 October 2011

My other half

Seriously that is what I used to call him...but now he is better known as hubby and most recently daddy. Actually in all honesty I call him daddy now even when my son is happily tucked up in bed and fast asleep dreaming. Talk about labelling someone!!! The positive though is that it does show just how much I need him to make my little family work. Since the beginning he has been my rock and he has kept me sane. Just in case you are wondering the beginning started a long time before we had our son. He is possibly one of the few people in the world that accepts me for who I am. Believe I am not the easiest of persons to get to know much less to get along with so he deserves a gold medal just for that. So it's a bonus that he is a great dad too. He was in it from my son was the bean in my tummy. In the beginning he was happy to humour me and care for my son my way (or at least he made me think that anyway) but nowadays he asks what he is supposed to do but does it his way anyway. It's great to be able to relax as I know my son has this great role model as he learns to become a toddler, boy and man in this great big bad world of ours. Gosh it's not father's day and it's not his birthday, it's just one of those days where I really value my other half.

Saturday 22 October 2011

Saturday is caption day

Yes it's that time again for some simple Saturday fun. Just think of a caption for the photo below. Happy Saturday!

Now go and have some more fun over at mammasaurus..

Saturday Is Caption Day

Friday 21 October 2011

The Friday Song Choice

I seriously can't believe it's friday already. It's been one of those weeks at work already and I'm just starting this job. Hubby has been listening to this great CD compilation "Getting Soulful" and this one is certainly a favourite and definitely getting me into that Friday feeling. Bring on the weekend!

Wednesday 19 October 2011

Mornings, Evenings and Weekends

To put it short and sweet, mornings, evenings and weekends are now the times that matter so much to me as I have been back to work....ooooooh....for all of a week and half. The first morning was probably the hardest as you can't figure out in your head how you are going to get everything you usually get done as well as get yourself ready for work and out the door in time. As hubby and I have worked out how to play tag team this aspect has certainly gotten easier. I am trying not to think too hard about the days when he has to travel for conferences ect. I can always go to work a bit smelly or maybe come down with a really bad flu! 

Work has thankfully gotten pretty busy pretty quick so I have not really spent a lot of time clock watching wondering what he is getting himself up to at nursery. I do notice very quickly though when the clock hits 5 and I am out of the door like a shot. The first day I literally ran home to spend time with my son. I am not looking forward to those days when I know I am going to have to go in early and work late. I know with my job as well that it is only a matter of course before this starts happening. God bless flexi days!!! 

Our first weekend...well that just went by too quickly. Before I knew it Monday was knocking on my door. 

My son is possibly tired now of all the extra hugs and kisses and constant reminders that "mummy loves you very much". Never mind that he has really settled well into nursery and he probably has more fun there than he does at home. I'm sorry I'm just not ready to do painting with a 7 month old. Thank goodness he is at least happy to see me or hubby when we go to pick him up. When he comes home he is absolutely shattered! Then mummy is like no it's time to play some more? 

That's what happens when mornings, evening and weekends matter so much. 

Sunday 16 October 2011

To blog or not to blog?

Yes that is the question. Recently I joined the netmums blogger network and got a badge. Then I started following some parent blogs. Then I found out about britmums and well as you do I joined up. I started not only following blogs of interest but left comments too. I even joined in a meme!!! You see they say that is way to get people to find out about your blog and if your lucky they might start following you (hmmm that's yet to happen). I did at least start getting more traffic though. I finally found out what SEO meant, learnt that people where going to conferences and even getting awards. Everyone was writing to get noticed. I have talked about the pressure that put on me already. Blogging is not supposed to be about pressure though is it? You see I notice now that a lot of the blogs I enjoy reading suddenly start doing reviews of all the fancy products they get for free in the mail and tell me about how good it is...yeah I know...this review is in no way influenced by the marketer. That's the power of blogs these days, it's great for advertising. Then you get memes, linky's or whatever you want to call them. I could probably find one for everyday of the week and never have to write a personal post that I thought of myself again.  I started to follow a lot of new blogs and it's amazing how very quickly they all follow this vain of advertising, linking, facebooking, twittering all in the name of getting noticed but unfotunately for me I personally feel they lose out. Their voices drift as blogging seems to become a job and a way of living....professional. It can be to the point where followers get hooked, begging for more. Readers can actually become quite demanding with expectations of what you are going to tell them and maybe deservedly so cause we bloggers put them there.

I started back work this week and well I just never really could find the time to blog. Actually I probably could but somehow just did not feel compelled. You see I found myself racing home to spend time with my son as time suddenly became this valuable commodity. Friday came and I knew I should be putting on my Friday song choice...but that was just it...the only song that came to my head that morning was about a little green frog that went hmmm hmmm as I stuck out my tongue and made my son laugh. Saturday I usually find a funny picture of my son to post so others can think up a caption but instead I just wanted to live those funny pictures and not worry about what others thought of them. 

To blog or not to blog? yeah I will be honest I want to blog and I do want others to read it. I have little moments where I have thoughts that I want to get down and share. It's a release and it feels good to express myself. I'm just going to do it differently now. So it may not be everyday, once a week or once a month as recommended to keep my readers (who are very limited anyway) enthralled and happy. It will be just enough to make me happy and maybe embarrass my son for when he is older.

Sunday 9 October 2011

How do you do family?

So as I start back work hubby makes the comment "So now we are the typical family, you know mum and dad work and the child goes to school", then he thought about it and said "Well not that we would not be typical if you weren't working but you know what I mean". Is there a typical family? How do you do family? Am I brave enough to consider such a topic that is open to heated political debate? I actually have an essay about this somewhere and was tempted to get it out and reread it...BUT...somehow I resisted. Thankfully I will not get graded on this blog post. 

We all know the mum and dad and 2.5 kids scenario does exist...defined as the nuclear family if we want to be technical...but it is certainly not THE definition of family any more. I mean you have single parent families, extended families, step families, fostered and adopted families (add others here as you think of them). Yet it's not just the structure that's changed but it's the assumptions of how we should "do" family as well. Decisions like who works and who stays at home? Parents managing with health problems, alcohol or drink problems, parents with disabilities or taking care of a child with disabilities. So many parents are out there fighting for the support they need to make their families work that it's constantly changing. Never mind personal values, ethics and beliefs and your own history based on the way you were raised.

We are a small family, mum, dad and son. Our extended family of grandparents and aunties live far away, so though a supportive network, we tend to rely on each other as a couple to get our family to work. We e-mail and we skype and to stay connected with our family. I have many homes and we hope to be able to travel as much as possible to visit them. We hope to be a bilingual family. I could not afford to stay at home really if we want to buy that dream house and give our son everything he needs (or should I say what we think he needs). He had to go to nursery cause there is no one else for babysitting duties. That's the simple version of how we do family. Ever thought about how you do family?

Saturday 8 October 2011

Saturday is Caption Day

Can you think of a caption for the photo below? Then go and have some more fun over at mammasaurus. Happy Saturday!

Friday 7 October 2011

The Friday Song Choice

Okay so after a week of rain here in Glasgow, I wake up to glorious sunshine this morning. I need some positivity as I start work on Monday and my wee man heads to nursery. He has actually settled in really well and possibly enjoys it more than being stuck all day with his mother :(

Wednesday 5 October 2011

Slap me...I'm a mum!

Before you say it, no, it's not because sometimes I forget. It's just that sometimes I forget the weight of it. Remember I went clubbing on Saturday? Well while I was out I could not help but think what would my son think if he saw me now. What a way the tables have turned? It really was not that long ago when I was thinking what MY mum and dad would be thinking.

All my friends AND my husbands friends are all doing it...having kids. We are all at different stages some with toddlers and some with newborns and one just born on Saturday. Conversation is inevitably at some point about our children and how they are getting on. I slowly made it through the fog of the first six weeks and the baby blues. I slowly got over the guilt of stopping to breastfeed after 2 months (ok, maybe I still have niggly guilty feelings every now and again). I slowly got into a routine with my son, recognising when he's hungry or when he's just tired. I felt comfortable and confident going out and about with him and we survived our first plane journey together. Sometimes you feel so confident you start offering friends advice based on "experience". Not that it's all plain sailing. I'm going back to work, my son is starting nursery and he does not want to sleep there or take his milk from strangers and so we find ourselves rehashing our routine again.

Then it hits me, usually when I am just about to go to sleep. I have a son. I have responsibility. He could want to be anything when he grows up and I can affect that. My sister told me a great philosophy...choose your battles...so she let her son pierce his ear and dye his hair blonde. Then hubby says to me but what if they feel then that they are not rebelling and do something even more extravagant. Do children really think that way? So all you seasoned mums out there, if you hear me saying something silly or well just downright stupid, slap me! or maybe just a nice gentle slap on the back.

Tuesday 4 October 2011

How personal are you willing to get?

So with blogging nowadays not only do you get pictures but you even get video...vlogging. Seeing who is behind the words, you don't just get to imagine any more how they are expressing themselves, their tone of voice but you get to see it all and hear it for yourself. Hubby is not a huge fan of the whole social networking business and is a bit weary now of how much about our son I actually post. I was starting to cross his line when I started posting pictures of our son. "It's private, our business and the only people we need to be sharing video's with is the grandparents." You see though I am socially connected to so many people in so many different ways that when I think about it sometimes, it's kind of scary. Why exhibit so much of your life to an on line community of people, some and most of whom you are probably never likely to meet. The online community of parents from websites with forums to bloggers is vast. So big that some turn it into a successful business and sometimes so powerful they are able to fight for change. It's a trusting community as well and it appears to have a hidden rule that no body is going to cross any lines and abuse the system and you don't need to be police checked. Why are we so trusting? We are not just putting ourselves out there but our families as well.

This blog has always been personal to me and about me AND unlike most out there it's not about stats and readership and who's following but just a way to finally get my thoughts out of my head...so...you know....they can stop plaguing me. Okay recently I got two new followers and a tad bit excited...I lie...Woohoo...welcome. I even insisted I was not going to talk about my pregnancy and my son! Then I realised most of my thoughts just happened to revolve around those topics so that was a bit nonsensical. Before you know it I am reading 101 other parent blogs, commenting on their stories, maybe even secretly trying to gain friends and "hangs head in shame" maybe a few more followers....

Everything you read now is ALL about how to get more people reading and interested in your blog and that seems to mean getting more personal. The pressure on me is mounting...edit...delete...edit...delete...this in no way compares to what others are writing...you mean you can get awards!!!...edit....delete. A horrible spiral that will see me possibly dwindle into oblivion.  So I don't compare and just try and get the damn thoughts down QUICKLY as they always sound better in my head. It's a blog, of course it's personal and yes I'm happily posting pictures...but I don't know if I am ready to show you my life on video just yet...there lots of things about me I probably won't share. If it isolates me that's just a chance I have to take because that is as personal as I'm willing to get.

Monday 3 October 2011

I'll never be a yummy mummy

So I snuck out of the house on Saturday night and went clubbing with some girlfriends. To be honest me going clubbing was rare even before I had my son. We are more go to dinner, concerts or go to specific 'themed' nights out that played music my husband is willing to listen to. Yet whenever I have been out I have never felt as old as I did on Saturday night. The young girls primping in the bathroom was amazing to watch, I was in awe as I quickly wiped away some sweat and reapplied some lip gloss. I then quickly ran out in a fog of hairspray.

You see not only am I not a seasoned clubber I am also more of a jeans and t-shirt kind of gal. I was given strict instructions to wear a dress and high heels on Saturday night cause well my friends just know what I am like. Having my son became a perfect excuse not to have to worry about my sense of style even less. In the first few weeks I loved living in my pyjamas. I took a shower and then put my pyjamas back on again! Then I go out and notice these mums still with all this make up on, all prim and proper...when did they find time to do that? 

Yet as the months go by the excuses are kind of starting to dwindle. Now that I go back to work I will maybe even have some extra dosh to spend a little on myself as well. I mean I want my son to think you know that I'm pretty. Something tells me though I'll never be a yummy mummy.
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