When it's epic

Epic is actually a relatively new word for me. Working with children in schools I have identified it as THE way to describe something big and usually cool. What though when it's EPIC, that is huge, but it's a very negative response to not being able to get your own way aka "The Tantrum". I'm actually not sure whether to call them tantrums or just general break downs in behavior of the good variety. It ranges from tears to begging to ear piercing screams. Recently the wee man's responses to not getting his own way has been EPIC.

I get it he's only 2 years and 8 months and pushing boundaries is what they do. I admit I strongly believe in setting boundaries, I'm a supporter of "routine" be it flexible but these days....

These days it honestly feels a little bit all over the place. Why am I debating with a 2 year old? It can pop it's big EPIC head over anything. Like peeling his fruit and cutting it in half and he decides that today he would like a whole one when yesterday he was struggling and spitting the skin out. I have those moments where I can stand really strong then I have those moments where I just want to give in. It really wears me down. He did the same thing yesterday, I never gave in to the tears, but here we are in the same situation today. I know stick with it and we will get there in the end but seriously am I allowed to question when that end is?

I think I'm actually writing this post in the hope I can look back on this post and go yeah I weathered that storm and actually it was not so bad and sometimes actually funny if you look at it a different way. Then again I will probably look back on it and think and "I thought that was bad?"

EPIC it's a good word though.

Trying to keep the peace

It's hard sometimes being mum. My life at the moment seems to be worrying everyday about whether I am doing it right or not.  Sometimes when my wee man gets it wrong I can't help but looking about to see who is looking, trying to imagine what they are thinking, what they want to say. Sometimes it is really hard to brush it away and just concentrate on being mummy. Everyone has their own opinion on how to be a parent. Navigating the politics of parenting can be like working your way through quick sand. Some views are stronger than others and some can't help but to push them onto you and suck you down. In the beginning it was hard to ignore but I'm getting a bit better at it now. There are so many issues to contend with but at the minute there is one which outweighs them all. 

With my wee man really getting good at "pushing" boundaries and throwing tantrums a whole new light has been thrown on motherhood. Most times I don't really have the answers and most times I am just desperately trying not to get frustrated. My only rule really through it all is to stay calm. If he is miserable and then I get miserable it just means we are both miserable and nothing is solved. Yet there are those times when my voice gets louder, I lose that patience and I get so frustrated I just want to pull my hair out. It's those times when the tantrum just happens with no solution in sight because how the hell did we get to this point in the first place. 

The popular vote tells me its the "terrible twos". It certainly is terribly tiring, terribly trying and terribly emotional.