It's hard sometimes being mum. My life at the moment seems to be worrying everyday about whether I am doing it right or not. Sometimes when my wee man gets it wrong I can't help but looking about to see who is looking, trying to imagine what they are thinking, what they want to say. Sometimes it is really hard to brush it away and just concentrate on being mummy. Everyone has their own opinion on how to be a parent. Navigating the politics of parenting can be like working your way through quick sand. Some views are stronger than others and some can't help but to push them onto you and suck you down. In the beginning it was hard to ignore but I'm getting a bit better at it now. There are so many issues to contend with but at the minute there is one which outweighs them all.
With my wee man really getting good at "pushing" boundaries and throwing tantrums a whole new light has been thrown on motherhood. Most times I don't really have the answers and most times I am just desperately trying not to get frustrated. My only rule really through it all is to stay calm. If he is miserable and then I get miserable it just means we are both miserable and nothing is solved. Yet there are those times when my voice gets louder, I lose that patience and I get so frustrated I just want to pull my hair out. It's those times when the tantrum just happens with no solution in sight because how the hell did we get to this point in the first place.
The popular vote tells me its the "terrible twos". It certainly is terribly tiring, terribly trying and terribly emotional.